Tuesday, 21 April 2009

Leading Me On.

You know, for once I thought I was going to be the girl who walked down the street holding hands. The girl who had a smile on her face, because she had a gorgeous guy on her arm. The one who was in that annoying 'I have a guy and I want you to have one too because I'm so happy' bracket.

Instead, I'm back to being the girl who guys don't seem to want in that way. Kip went funny on me on Sunday night when we were texting, just a slight shift in the way he was texting, but I noticed. Then yesterday when I got back I noticed that he wasn't exactly making an effort for us to be alone. So I went to bed, and texted him.
"Did I do something wrong?"
"No. Why's that?"
"Dunno. I must just be in a strange mood. You can come in if you like, after you've escaped from Joe's room."
"Ok. Uhm I'm going to tell you now though that I'm not ready for a relationship cause I can't seem to get over my ex still."

So you texted me ALL holidays acting as though we were going to be something, when you KNEW the WHOLE FUCKING TIME that we were never going to be anything? Jeez. Thanks for leading me on, jackass.
He did come into my room. He apologised, said that it was "nothing to do with you." Funnily enough, that doesn't make me feel any better.

I know I was worried about my true feelings for him, and Joe made me think that maybe I only like him because he liked me, but I'm still hurt. I can see I'm never going to get to be 'that' girl, only ever the friend.

3 comments:

Thomas said...

I think you should press him on this issue. I doubt he is being sincere and a nice long conversation could get the truth out of him.

Anonymous said...

I think he is being honest. What would you rather, he be dishonest and then have a nasty breakup with you since you were just the 'rebound girl' or to take your time and be friends with possibilities down the line?

I know your anxious to have your first serious relationship, and he may or may not be that person, but I don't think being angry at him for being honest is good.

I also don't think, based on the pictures you have posted, that you really have anything to be worried about in the "I'm only desireable as a friend" department. You are attractive, and judging by this blog, intelligent.

Anonymous said...

Um, here's the obvious answer: STOP texting!! Texting is just an excuse from having a real conversation with a person -- i.e. substantive communication. Without any substantive communication, how in the world do you think you could have a relationship?!? You can't maintain a relationship (at least, one worth keeping) by texting.

I mean, look at you: You spend a bunch of time with this guy, but rather than ask him outright if there was a problem, you waited till later to text him and ask him. That's pathetic and immature.