Why did Jake break my heart? I'm not really sure. He said that he loved me, but it's not in the way he used to and he can't go on anymore. He's got so much on his plate right now and he can't handle a relationship, especially one where his feelings have changed. There is nothing I did, nothing went wrong in the relationship. He just changed, and there's nothing I could do about it. I asked him if I should wait around for something that may or may not happen, and he told me that it would be selfish of him to ask me to wait when he doesn't know how he feels. I took that to mean "move on, it's over forever," but there is still a part of me that hopes we can fix this.
It hurts to know that he will never sleep beside me again, that I will never kiss his lips again. The movies we planned on seeing together I will now have to see with someone else, and the restaurants we wanted to try will have to be tried with someone else, or alone.
Tomorrow I'm taking his stuff back, plus a few things he gave me that I don't want because they hold to much meaning. I wrote him a letter that thanks him for all the good times we shared over the past ten-and-a-bit months, but I'm not sure if I'll give it to him, because I don't want to seem like I'm begging for him to take me back (which I'm not), but I don't want him to forget me.
I will never forget him, because he was my first almost everything.
2 comments:
In general he seemed like a decent enough guy who treated you reasonably well. I think the relationship was probably a good thing, and I suggest you seek something similiar out again in the future rather than what I've seen some women do who after their first serious relationship go a little crazy and in effect devalue their future relationships in an effort not to hurt again.
Hello: You can not imagine how I liked your blog. It intersante and I would like to know, you're gay??. Virgus.mistik write to me @ gmail.com, I write in Nicaragua.
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