Everyone is worried about the relationship, with him being so much older than her, settled into his life and obviously the distance between him. A lot of people have been trying to talk her out of such a relationship, encouraging her to find someone her own age and perhaps closer to home. I'm not going to deny that I too am worried about it. I worry that if she drops everything and move to Australia, something will go horribly wrong and she'll be all alone with no support.
Then I realised, who are we to impede on her happiness? She told me that she's never been so happy, and although at the moment the distance is annoying, she gets to go to Australia every holidays to see him, and he frequently flies over here (originally being a kiwi himself). If she's happy, why should we try and stop her? I've decided that I'll support her in what she wants to do, but I'm encouraging her to take it slow and not to rush into anything, which she has agreed - she too knows the risks.
She's not very happy in her flat, and I'd love to live with her next year, so I told her not to worry if she thinks moving to Australia is her only option, because it's not. She's well aware that every time they see each other, they're in holiday mode, and so she's planning on spending the summer over the ditch before she makes any decisions.
At the end of the day, I just want her to be happy, and if that happiness will come to her by moving to Australia, then good for her. I'll be here for her whether she moves or stays.
1 comment:
True anecdote:
He was 29, she was 19. She graduated at 17 and went off to volunteer 9 months in small communities with Katimavik Canada, receiving a $1000 honourarium when done. She served her two years army service in the Israeli military, saw a lot of tragically sad stuff, then went back-packing the forests of Finland, touring Sweden, Denmark, much of N. Europe then Scotland, England and Wales. One September day she was in London picking up her mail from home at the Am-Ex office. She walked up to a fellow reading his mail, sitting under the Nelson monument in Trafalgar square – “Didn’t I see you performing in Godspell in Vancouver?” “Yes.” They chatted for a while. He said he’d bought a motorcycle and was heading to France and warmer weather South. She said she was heading south too and was invited along. Although they slept in the same tent, the first months were platonic because she was “just a kid” in his mind. They traveled France, Spain, North Africa, Italy, Greece, Israel and Egypt together. In time he grew to love her and she him. They lived in Israel for 8 months, got pregnant, returned to Canada, and raised a family. http://magickallgateway.net/poetry/Love/jewelscrown.html
He taught while she took a degree at university and managed a Real Estate office. 19 with 29?
It perhaps depends on how much experience with life the younger person has, as to how well this kind of relationship will do.
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